Viral Science: Wikipedia A Love Song

Viral Science: Wikipedia A Love Song

What would happen if you dated Wikipedia and then split up?

I have spent quite a bit of time recently exploring and editing Wikipedia for various projects. So, for a viral science post I decided to post up this video about the story of what it would be like to be in a realtionship with Wikipedia:

Here are the lyrics to the song:

When I met you, I thought you were really smart
And even more so when we started going out
It was your intellect that really won my heart
There was so much stuff you knew so much about

I was hungry for knowledge, and I was single
I didn’t want to date and really hadn’t planned to
You were cool and you were smart and multilingual
And I felt like I could really understand you

But then, it went downhill
and we can never get back to our better days
I’m done, I’ve had my thrill
and I think we ought to go our separate ways

But it isn’t you, it’s me
I guess we just weren’t meant to be
I thought we were inseparable, I thought you were my friend
But looking back now, it all makes sense at the end

You’re sometimes vague, and you’re often inconsistent
You’ve no opinions, you never take a stance
You’re so dispassionate, you always sound so distant
And I tell you, you know zilch about romance

And not once did you ever say you love me
You sent no flowers, you NEVER called me “honey”
You always talked as if you were above me
And it feels like you are always needing money

Sometimes you generalize,
And on better days your tone is condescending
And when we talk books or films
You ALWAYS find a way spoil the ending

But it isn’t you, it’s me
I need someone more scholarly
I thought you had the answers, but your smarts are all pretend
And my attraction only makes sense at the end

You just believe everything you’re ever told
You never question, I’m pretty sure you don’t fact check
When someone puts ideas into your head
You never blink, you immediately buy it
I won’t say that you have no integrity… but I might imply it

It turns out you’re not the guy I thought I knew
and I think we need to stop and take a breather
I never know if what you’re saying’s really true
and frankly, sometimes, I don’t think you know either

You have no real facts, your knowledge is all heresay
And I’m tired of playing all your stupid games
You don’t keep pictures of me, and you don’t know my birthday
I don’t think that you even know my name

You keep tabs on other girls
But I notice there’s no article for me
You’re known by all the world
So I guess I’m just a droplet in the sea

But it isn’t you, it’s me
I owe you no apology
I know not to judge my company just based upon its looks
I’m too grown-up for your articles, it’s time that I read books

Wikipedia and the Gay Necrophiliac Duck

This week sees the 10th Birthday of Wikipedia. From the humble beginnings of its first edit “Hello World”, a test by founder Jimmy Wales, to being one of the biggest website in the world, Wikipedia has been on quite a journey. I thought it would be a good opportunity on this landmark occasion to look the amusing forgotten pages of Wikipedia that didnt make the cut into the 3,529,000 English pages. I have picked my favourites of the list of bizarre Wikipedia pages people have created and where possible written what they wanted to say.

Science/Health

Potato Coma – “…when a digestive system, that is use to potatos eaten regularly, has a lack of potatoes.”

Paper: The fat free chocolate

Shoes and Degenerative Diseases

Squirrels and booze

MASSIVE TRAFFIC CONE SHAPED ALIENS FROM OUTER SPACE

Oscillating penguin of ultimate seduction

Homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck – Was referring to an IgNobel Prize winning study

Why not to sleep in a bamboo forest? – Single sentence. “Because the bamboo will grow through you… resulting in Death.”

Aeroneurophycosis – “in which the sufferer developes a sexual atraction to aircraft”

Religion

The belief that a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanityWas a redirect to Christianity.

Jesus built the Pyramids

Judaism and bus stops

Pope Hamster

Politics

The Smurfs and Communism

United States Senate Special Committee on Bondage

List of convicted drunk drivers who have become President of the United States Page contained one item “George W Bush”

Just plain random…

Buildings Elvis has left – A rather long list of places

CheeseCheeseCheese

Don’t Move your Panda

There are hundreds of these online and there are many more funny ones up there, going through the discussions on the pages on whether or not to deleted them is a very interesting thing to do!  Who knows what will be up there in the next 10 years…